So this election has got me thinking about the one argument that I've heard most "equal rights" feminist women (some who are my friends) make... "Women make 81% (or whatever the current statistic is) to what a man makes. That's bull****, its not fair and we need to institute some sort of law that makes this illegal". It maddens me that people are voting towards one candidate or the other for this battle of women's equality. I feel like they are pushing us back to the time of suppression where there was a need for womens rights arguments, and rallies and the feminist movement. But I truly believe we are past that era and time, and we need to move forward (not a slogan that I'm trying to steal from the Incumbent President I promise)
Well we do have a law, a slue of them, that makes this illegal. One of them is the Civil Rights Act of 1964" (Title VII)- it makes it illegal to discriminate against an individual based on race, sex, national origin, religion and color. So there's a protection for discrimination. Differentiating pay more for a man vs a woman? Any lawyer can construe discrimination against that...
Not good enough you say? Ok, let's go with something a little more direct:
The Equal Pay Act of 1963 (EPA) This law makes it illegal to pay different wages to men and women if they perform equal work in the same workplace. The law also makes it illegal to retaliate against a person because the person complained about discrimination, filed a charge of discrimination, or participated in an employment discrimination investigation or lawsuit.
Those are only two of a ton of laws that are there to protect each individual in a workplace against unfair practices, and therefore getting rid of the "good ole boys" and "men's club" era. Are there some companies that still practice this? Hmm...probably. On a lesser scale. Should it be stopped? Absolutely. But let's be honest... One manager who is newly promoted, should not expect to make as much as a manager that she had replaced solely because there is a difference of their time in position, experience in the position, their previous reviews (also known as merit based raises), etc. If a company loses a lawsuit over this, there's normally a reason and it can be taken down to the direct management level - not a practice of a major corporation, and a practice throughout the entire corporation. When determining pay for a new manager, so many factors go into play; their current pay, their past experience, amount of responsibility, past performance, etc. Example: One manager makes 70k a year, while another makes 60k. One has been in position for 3 years, the other is starting a new position, and was promoted into that position. Should the new manager make exactly the same pay as the manager who was there for 3 years? ABSOLUTELY NOT. They are at different levels of expertise. It only makes it fair to be started out at a lower pay rate than the manager who has been there for 3 years.
So let's look at the statistic, and what it really means, and what it represents.
In April of 2012, the statistic was that full time women earned 81% of what full time men made. So for every Dollar a man made, the woman made 81 cents. (in the words of what one of my favorite comedians stated - wait a minute, that doesn't make sense, that's not fair, the man's only left with 19...Bo Burnham - even though his statistics were older than this) So just to make up for that gap, women would have to work until the middle of March. Sorry. No thanks. So just off that statistic, it isn't fair at all.
Now what goes into this statistic: what does it include? Well, does it take into account how many hours each sex works? NO. Does it take into account what sector each sex works in? NO. Does it take into account the actual positions of each? NOPE. So how is it a fair representation of pay? It's not. It's a boosted statistic, plain and simple. It says on average, women work 7.75 hours a day, vs a man's 8.14. (which means women leave early, and men stay a bit later) Also, think about this... maternity leave.... Men get paternity leave, just not as much as a woman gets. So the average women's pay gets taken down a few months already. So lifetime earning potential is lower, due to less time worked. So, disadvantage to women right?. Do we say that's unfair because we get 3 months off work to spend with our precious newborn baby? Which is completely optional to take mind you. If you say it's unfair, you are just impossible to please. You can't have it both ways. Sorry.
Also, think of this - if a company offered you an executive position that started at, oh I dunno, 100,000 a year. Would you take it - no questions asked? What if they then told you this would require you to travel Mon - Fri, and work 60 hours a week... even when you are at home, you'd still have to be on call, and email when you are at home. So you would be required to be away from your family every day but the weekends. Would you take it then? Why or why not? Now, if a woman (mother) is answering these questions, it's a longer pause, and more of a debate with herself as to if it's really worth it. A man answering it would have less of a battle, because to him he views the job as an ability to take care of his family better. Now, obviously, I'm not an expert, but I'm not an idiot. This isn't for every single situation out there, but, it's a compelling argument. You have to admit that women are less likely to actively pursue those occupations because, by nature, they tend to go for different kinds of occupations, that have stable hours, more time off, and different sectors that are inherently paid less than those sectors that pay more.
So, for those who still believe there is a gap in pay, there may be a slight one, but that's bound to be just because of a few differences that are not avoidable. How can we move forward if you believe in the statistics that keep us in the past? And how can we truly make a change if we aren't willing to look at the real statistics that show a gap?
Monday, October 29, 2012
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Guts on the internet....
So I just read this article that talked about people being more rude on social networking/internet sites. And I honestly have to agree with it 100%. (It was on Yahoo, so if you're interested in reading it go for it)
It made me think of all the arguments I see posted on facebook, and all the rude comments people make like it's not a big deal to say these things to someone online. The arguments I've seen lately are obviously about politics, and people just can't seem to be accepting of other people's opinions. Like the whole chick-fil-a fiasco. Someone posts something that is funny, or whatever, and immediately everyone takes offense to it, or jumps down that person's throat for being biased against the gay community and not supporting them. I'm not going to get into the whole debate on who was right/wrong and whose side I would choose, because that's pointless. No matter what I say I'll offend someone. But what I did see and experience was pathetic. Because I don't view something the same as you, or I find something funny, I'm automatically a bigot, who has no acceptance for anyone other than myself or whatever. Funny. Isn't what you're doing and how you're acting exactly what you're claiming me to be?
It makes me cringe when I read comments on articles, posts, or whatever that are soo blatantly disrespectful to someone else. I feel our society has lost all morals, and respect to each other. It's scary when you think about it. If you look back 20 years ago, people seemed to be much more respectful to each other. It was human nature to not automatically go off on someone for something they post. And if they really did have a problem they would have to say it to their face to resolve it. Nowadays you can make a snide remark or a post to be rude to someone, or even worse straight out disrespect that person and be the rudest individual I've ever met and not really have to deal with the consequence or guilt of seeing that person's reaction to your hostility. I don't understand how people think that just because they are typing something that it gives them the right to say whatever they want, however they want, and not have any consequences.
I guess it goes back to what I was saying in my last blog. Parents aren't teaching the same values we used to be taught. When did it become okay to skip over the respect lesson in childhood? And why are parents allowing this to happen? If you're going to be rude enough to disrespect someone on the internet you better be rude enough to say it to them in person. Man up. Or just be even more mature and leave your nasty comments to yourself. Weren't you taught that if you didn't have something nice to say then don't say anything at all? I hope parents teach their kids this for our next generation, and that our morals and manners start becoming a consistent thing for our country. I'm scared at what will happen if we can't even respect each other enough to have our own views and beliefs in this world.
It made me think of all the arguments I see posted on facebook, and all the rude comments people make like it's not a big deal to say these things to someone online. The arguments I've seen lately are obviously about politics, and people just can't seem to be accepting of other people's opinions. Like the whole chick-fil-a fiasco. Someone posts something that is funny, or whatever, and immediately everyone takes offense to it, or jumps down that person's throat for being biased against the gay community and not supporting them. I'm not going to get into the whole debate on who was right/wrong and whose side I would choose, because that's pointless. No matter what I say I'll offend someone. But what I did see and experience was pathetic. Because I don't view something the same as you, or I find something funny, I'm automatically a bigot, who has no acceptance for anyone other than myself or whatever. Funny. Isn't what you're doing and how you're acting exactly what you're claiming me to be?
It makes me cringe when I read comments on articles, posts, or whatever that are soo blatantly disrespectful to someone else. I feel our society has lost all morals, and respect to each other. It's scary when you think about it. If you look back 20 years ago, people seemed to be much more respectful to each other. It was human nature to not automatically go off on someone for something they post. And if they really did have a problem they would have to say it to their face to resolve it. Nowadays you can make a snide remark or a post to be rude to someone, or even worse straight out disrespect that person and be the rudest individual I've ever met and not really have to deal with the consequence or guilt of seeing that person's reaction to your hostility. I don't understand how people think that just because they are typing something that it gives them the right to say whatever they want, however they want, and not have any consequences.
I guess it goes back to what I was saying in my last blog. Parents aren't teaching the same values we used to be taught. When did it become okay to skip over the respect lesson in childhood? And why are parents allowing this to happen? If you're going to be rude enough to disrespect someone on the internet you better be rude enough to say it to them in person. Man up. Or just be even more mature and leave your nasty comments to yourself. Weren't you taught that if you didn't have something nice to say then don't say anything at all? I hope parents teach their kids this for our next generation, and that our morals and manners start becoming a consistent thing for our country. I'm scared at what will happen if we can't even respect each other enough to have our own views and beliefs in this world.
Friday, September 28, 2012
Customer Service - Give in or Stand Firm?
So I work in retail. Let me clarify. I manage the only warranty center in all of Clark County, in more than a 4 hour radius, for a very well known wireless company, with very well known service problems. I deal with angry customers all day. No joke. ALL DAY. They come into my location already pissed off that their phone isn't working, then even more mad because they most likely made another stop at another store, only to be told to drive over 30 minutes just to get to my location. And because we are the only location in the entire state, we have an hour wait to see a technician.
So customer service is my job. It's my lively hood. I've worked retail over 10 years, I'm good at customer service. I'm good at managing and maintaining an active and friendly environment. My customer satisfaction scores for my entire location are in the high 90's,(up from the 70's when I started) and my situation is more unique than most of the other warranty centers in the country. We are not co located with the retail or corporate stores, so we are a separate destination. We service people from AZ, UT, NV, and even parts of CA. We get over 1600 claims a month. We have an average of a 10 minute wait time, at any time of day. We are the 8th busiest store in the company (only beaten out by other locations in way more populated areas- IE New York. Puerto Rico, etc) Yet we are still able to maintain an almost perfect customer satisfaction score. And mind you, we also have a very high troubleshooting resolved percentage (so we don't just replace their phones to make them happy). It has sickened me though to see what companies will ask of their employees to ensure customer satisfaction. How much is too much, and when do you just give up and let the customer go? When is it worth it???
I recently had a situation where a customer was verbally abusive towards two of my employees. (Mind you, my nickname as a manager is Mama Bear. I'm so protective over my employees. I back them up 100% of the time, and will do anything in my power to make sure their working environment is as good as it can be, and if it's not I'm focused on making it better. I wasn't in the store at the time, or I'm sure I would have been fired for what I wanted to do to the customer.) So the situation was basically the customer came in with a liquid damaged phone - it voids the warranty when the little white sticker turns red due to water or liquid activating it. He had insurance on his phone, so we could have helped him make a claim. Now this wasn't a $600 smart phone, it was a free basic phone, that had the lowest deductible, etc. My employee that was helping him is by far the most professional customer service rep I've ever worked with, and I've never even seen him roll his eyes at a customer or get frustrated with one. He explained that it was out of warranty, and we could help him file the claim, or some other options he had available (he was also eligible for an upgrade, and there's always the option of buying a pay as you go phone to use in the mean time, repairing the phone, etc) He didn't end the the interaction with sorry you're out of warranty, I can't help you. He offered help in the ways we could help. That's all he could have done. The customer was not happy about this- he asked to speak to the manager - well I was off, so the supervisor, who was the manager on duty, took control of the situation. Gave him the same information on what we were able to do, etc. My supervisor was asking my employee to look some other information up for him while he pulled up his account to see if there was anything else we could do for an out of the box type resolution. As my employee was replying to his supervisor, the customer interjected and told my employee very politely (right) - to shut the f* up, that he was done talking and wasn't competent to do his job. This situation got escalated even further, blah blah blah... and eventually the next day got to me. My employees did everything right, notated the account, and maintained their professional demeanor - I even reviewed tape. The customer called me the next day asking if I heard about it and I replied I had, and asked how I could help him, etc. He started off right away by making personal remarks about one of my employees. Like saying he could tell he wasn't a clean employee (personal hygiene issues) because he was fat... etc. Extremely uncalled for comments, etc. Then he goes on to call me incompetent because I said the same thing my other employees did, as far as our resolution goes etc... and then said I probably slept my way to manager, because there was no way in hell I would ever be considered manager. OOOOH. BOY. Now he's done it. I bit my tongue. I then asked him to show me the same respect I showed him, and his response "I don't have to respect you. I walked into your place of business, you didn't walk into mine". SERIOUSLY? I ended the call as calmly as I could, called my market manager because I knew it would get escalated, he was just that kind of a customer, and let him know the situation, gave him the customer info and asked him to call the customer. The next phrase out of my managers mouth should have been "Well I'm sorry you had to deal with that, that is not acceptable by any means from anyone, an employee, customer or anyone. I will make sure this gets handled appropriately, and I will back you up 100%." Sadly it wasn't. His next words were "Well, try calling the customer back and see if we were able to waive the insurance deductible if that would make him happy". Hmm. I'm sorry what?
So there are two things I'm ranting about today: When did being rude, and yelling and cursing mean that you're going to get your way with a company? And: When did companies become so afraid of standing up for their employees for being personally attacked verbally?
The first part: Where do people get off thinking that if they yelled, cursed, throw things, throw a tantrum, that it means they will get their way? Why does it mean that because something unfortunate has happened, and it's out of policy or whatever the reason of why it can't be solved, mean that just throwing a tantrum will make it all of a sudden in policy, and able to be resolved? Now this isn't for everything that happens - sometimes companies make mistakes, and when they do, they normally own up to it. But sometimes, it's really the customers' fault. The customer is NOT ALWAYS RIGHT. That's right. They aren't. I'm Mrs. Customer Service. If you're in the right, I will do everything I can to help you. I will bend the rules, I will do whatever it takes. Even if you are out of policy, but you're polite, I am much more likely to bend the rules for you, vs you yelling and screaming at me. Can someone please tell me how society thinks this type of behavior warrants special circumstances for them? And who the hell raised these people to make them think that acting like this is acceptable? I understand if you're upset, completely get it. Vent towards the company, not the employees. I can handle a yelling customer, if they are screaming that they hate the company, and then saying I know it's not you who makes the rules, and I'm not yelling at you, or saying it's your fault, and I'm sorry for yelling at you.... I will do what I can to make them satisfied. But you personally attack me or my employees, that's the quickest way for me to deny every extra thing I can do for you. First off, you look like an idiot to everyone else in the store when you're screaming and being rude and condescending to an employee. Second off, half the reason you're so upset is because you know you messed up and you won't admit it. I'm sorry, you're phone does not magically get wet on its own. You did something and you want us to pay for it because you don't want to pay the insurance on your phone. Third off, didn't your parents teach you respect? Don't you teach your kids to respect other people? Don't you want respect in your workplace? Would you ever allow someone to talk like that to your wife/mom/daughter/son/sister/etc.? Would you ever let someone talk like that to you? So why is it ok to talk like that to them? Because you know they can't say anything back to you so you can feel like a hot shot? Screw you. Leave the store. Cancel your lines. I don't care. You screaming how you've been a loyal customer for 3 whole years. Let me break out the champagne! WOO HOO! That's probably the longest commitment you've ever made!!! Congratulations! Your $50 bill isn't worth me getting verbally abused. Or my employees. Hell, I wouldn't even let you talk to a stranger like that! You playing the loyal customer card, I spend a ton of money here card, etc, does not sway my decision. I do what is right, and I will help you if you spend $20 or $20,000. Every customer deserves the same service, and respect as the next one. So next time you are faced with an out of policy, or a special circumstance, please remember the employee you are working with is doing their job. They get yelled at all the time, maybe not by you, but by someone, and they are human. Each person has a limit to what they can take, and no one deserves to be treated second class because of a mistake or policy. I'm not saying all customer service reps are perfect, some have given attitude to me, but what if you're their hundredth call of the day, and 98 people have been yelling at them all day? How would you feel if every person you spoke to that day was yelling at you? That's a hard days work to stay cheerful and pleasant after being yelled at ALL DAY. And I am almost willing to bet they barely make any money for putting up with it too.
On to the second part: Companies. I know you are out to make every customer happy. You can't. I'm sorry. It's not possible. When you know that, you are ahead of some! But you companies and managers that allow this to happen, are the ones that have allowed society to get to the point where they think they can yell to get their way. If they've done it once, and got their way, they'll do it again and again, and then tell their friends to do it, and so on and so on. I know it works because my company bends all the time to make the upset customers happy. But the calm customers, that accept its out of policy get nothing? That's not fair. Because they were polite and understand that its out of policy and didn't scream, they don't get the exceptions made for them? Guess what, if you are going after a CSAT score (customer satisfaction) the angry customer that yelled and got his way- won't give you a good score. He'll blast you again on the survey. So you lost money (normally when you make an out of policy decision you lose money, but its seen as saving a customer so its a smart business move) and you have a bad survey. And, if it was bad service he was yelling over, do you really think he's going to come back? No he won't. And what kind of message are you delivering to your employees that are treated this way? That you don't care about their environment, and really, that you don't respect them either. It's a lose lose situation. Just once I'd like to see a company stand up and say you know what? You yell at my employee, you're done in my store. I don't want customers like you in my store. We respect you when you're here, and we expect the same respect from you as well. Not just a store. But a company.
Look at the restaurant business- I have a few friends that are waiters, and we were talking about this over dinner one night, just so happened to be the same day I was verbally abused by that customer above, and they said the same thing. If they messed up a meal, whether it be written down wrong, or made wrong, if the customer didn't make a big deal about it, then nothing is done. No credit on the bill, etc... But if the customer makes a big deal, and is upset, they credit the meal. Guess what, not only do they lose out on that money, the waiter most likely doesn't get as good of a tip, and they most likely won't come back to you're restaurant.
So when do you give in to a customer's demands, and when do you stand firm to the policy? I don't mind giving in to the demands if it's asked for respectful, and there's truly no other option. But trust me, you disrespect me or my employees, I will be standing firm all day long. Just a thought for everyone out there. If you don't work in retail, you shop retail. I hope you are not the demanding and rude customer, and if you are, look in the mirror. Is this who your mother would be proud of, is this behavior something she'd be ok with? And would you be ok with someone screaming at your grandmother this way? Or your child? If you aren't then adjust your approach. You always catch more flys with honey than vinegar....
So customer service is my job. It's my lively hood. I've worked retail over 10 years, I'm good at customer service. I'm good at managing and maintaining an active and friendly environment. My customer satisfaction scores for my entire location are in the high 90's,(up from the 70's when I started) and my situation is more unique than most of the other warranty centers in the country. We are not co located with the retail or corporate stores, so we are a separate destination. We service people from AZ, UT, NV, and even parts of CA. We get over 1600 claims a month. We have an average of a 10 minute wait time, at any time of day. We are the 8th busiest store in the company (only beaten out by other locations in way more populated areas- IE New York. Puerto Rico, etc) Yet we are still able to maintain an almost perfect customer satisfaction score. And mind you, we also have a very high troubleshooting resolved percentage (so we don't just replace their phones to make them happy). It has sickened me though to see what companies will ask of their employees to ensure customer satisfaction. How much is too much, and when do you just give up and let the customer go? When is it worth it???
I recently had a situation where a customer was verbally abusive towards two of my employees. (Mind you, my nickname as a manager is Mama Bear. I'm so protective over my employees. I back them up 100% of the time, and will do anything in my power to make sure their working environment is as good as it can be, and if it's not I'm focused on making it better. I wasn't in the store at the time, or I'm sure I would have been fired for what I wanted to do to the customer.) So the situation was basically the customer came in with a liquid damaged phone - it voids the warranty when the little white sticker turns red due to water or liquid activating it. He had insurance on his phone, so we could have helped him make a claim. Now this wasn't a $600 smart phone, it was a free basic phone, that had the lowest deductible, etc. My employee that was helping him is by far the most professional customer service rep I've ever worked with, and I've never even seen him roll his eyes at a customer or get frustrated with one. He explained that it was out of warranty, and we could help him file the claim, or some other options he had available (he was also eligible for an upgrade, and there's always the option of buying a pay as you go phone to use in the mean time, repairing the phone, etc) He didn't end the the interaction with sorry you're out of warranty, I can't help you. He offered help in the ways we could help. That's all he could have done. The customer was not happy about this- he asked to speak to the manager - well I was off, so the supervisor, who was the manager on duty, took control of the situation. Gave him the same information on what we were able to do, etc. My supervisor was asking my employee to look some other information up for him while he pulled up his account to see if there was anything else we could do for an out of the box type resolution. As my employee was replying to his supervisor, the customer interjected and told my employee very politely (right) - to shut the f* up, that he was done talking and wasn't competent to do his job. This situation got escalated even further, blah blah blah... and eventually the next day got to me. My employees did everything right, notated the account, and maintained their professional demeanor - I even reviewed tape. The customer called me the next day asking if I heard about it and I replied I had, and asked how I could help him, etc. He started off right away by making personal remarks about one of my employees. Like saying he could tell he wasn't a clean employee (personal hygiene issues) because he was fat... etc. Extremely uncalled for comments, etc. Then he goes on to call me incompetent because I said the same thing my other employees did, as far as our resolution goes etc... and then said I probably slept my way to manager, because there was no way in hell I would ever be considered manager. OOOOH. BOY. Now he's done it. I bit my tongue. I then asked him to show me the same respect I showed him, and his response "I don't have to respect you. I walked into your place of business, you didn't walk into mine". SERIOUSLY? I ended the call as calmly as I could, called my market manager because I knew it would get escalated, he was just that kind of a customer, and let him know the situation, gave him the customer info and asked him to call the customer. The next phrase out of my managers mouth should have been "Well I'm sorry you had to deal with that, that is not acceptable by any means from anyone, an employee, customer or anyone. I will make sure this gets handled appropriately, and I will back you up 100%." Sadly it wasn't. His next words were "Well, try calling the customer back and see if we were able to waive the insurance deductible if that would make him happy". Hmm. I'm sorry what?
So there are two things I'm ranting about today: When did being rude, and yelling and cursing mean that you're going to get your way with a company? And: When did companies become so afraid of standing up for their employees for being personally attacked verbally?
The first part: Where do people get off thinking that if they yelled, cursed, throw things, throw a tantrum, that it means they will get their way? Why does it mean that because something unfortunate has happened, and it's out of policy or whatever the reason of why it can't be solved, mean that just throwing a tantrum will make it all of a sudden in policy, and able to be resolved? Now this isn't for everything that happens - sometimes companies make mistakes, and when they do, they normally own up to it. But sometimes, it's really the customers' fault. The customer is NOT ALWAYS RIGHT. That's right. They aren't. I'm Mrs. Customer Service. If you're in the right, I will do everything I can to help you. I will bend the rules, I will do whatever it takes. Even if you are out of policy, but you're polite, I am much more likely to bend the rules for you, vs you yelling and screaming at me. Can someone please tell me how society thinks this type of behavior warrants special circumstances for them? And who the hell raised these people to make them think that acting like this is acceptable? I understand if you're upset, completely get it. Vent towards the company, not the employees. I can handle a yelling customer, if they are screaming that they hate the company, and then saying I know it's not you who makes the rules, and I'm not yelling at you, or saying it's your fault, and I'm sorry for yelling at you.... I will do what I can to make them satisfied. But you personally attack me or my employees, that's the quickest way for me to deny every extra thing I can do for you. First off, you look like an idiot to everyone else in the store when you're screaming and being rude and condescending to an employee. Second off, half the reason you're so upset is because you know you messed up and you won't admit it. I'm sorry, you're phone does not magically get wet on its own. You did something and you want us to pay for it because you don't want to pay the insurance on your phone. Third off, didn't your parents teach you respect? Don't you teach your kids to respect other people? Don't you want respect in your workplace? Would you ever allow someone to talk like that to your wife/mom/daughter/son/sister/etc.? Would you ever let someone talk like that to you? So why is it ok to talk like that to them? Because you know they can't say anything back to you so you can feel like a hot shot? Screw you. Leave the store. Cancel your lines. I don't care. You screaming how you've been a loyal customer for 3 whole years. Let me break out the champagne! WOO HOO! That's probably the longest commitment you've ever made!!! Congratulations! Your $50 bill isn't worth me getting verbally abused. Or my employees. Hell, I wouldn't even let you talk to a stranger like that! You playing the loyal customer card, I spend a ton of money here card, etc, does not sway my decision. I do what is right, and I will help you if you spend $20 or $20,000. Every customer deserves the same service, and respect as the next one. So next time you are faced with an out of policy, or a special circumstance, please remember the employee you are working with is doing their job. They get yelled at all the time, maybe not by you, but by someone, and they are human. Each person has a limit to what they can take, and no one deserves to be treated second class because of a mistake or policy. I'm not saying all customer service reps are perfect, some have given attitude to me, but what if you're their hundredth call of the day, and 98 people have been yelling at them all day? How would you feel if every person you spoke to that day was yelling at you? That's a hard days work to stay cheerful and pleasant after being yelled at ALL DAY. And I am almost willing to bet they barely make any money for putting up with it too.
On to the second part: Companies. I know you are out to make every customer happy. You can't. I'm sorry. It's not possible. When you know that, you are ahead of some! But you companies and managers that allow this to happen, are the ones that have allowed society to get to the point where they think they can yell to get their way. If they've done it once, and got their way, they'll do it again and again, and then tell their friends to do it, and so on and so on. I know it works because my company bends all the time to make the upset customers happy. But the calm customers, that accept its out of policy get nothing? That's not fair. Because they were polite and understand that its out of policy and didn't scream, they don't get the exceptions made for them? Guess what, if you are going after a CSAT score (customer satisfaction) the angry customer that yelled and got his way- won't give you a good score. He'll blast you again on the survey. So you lost money (normally when you make an out of policy decision you lose money, but its seen as saving a customer so its a smart business move) and you have a bad survey. And, if it was bad service he was yelling over, do you really think he's going to come back? No he won't. And what kind of message are you delivering to your employees that are treated this way? That you don't care about their environment, and really, that you don't respect them either. It's a lose lose situation. Just once I'd like to see a company stand up and say you know what? You yell at my employee, you're done in my store. I don't want customers like you in my store. We respect you when you're here, and we expect the same respect from you as well. Not just a store. But a company.
Look at the restaurant business- I have a few friends that are waiters, and we were talking about this over dinner one night, just so happened to be the same day I was verbally abused by that customer above, and they said the same thing. If they messed up a meal, whether it be written down wrong, or made wrong, if the customer didn't make a big deal about it, then nothing is done. No credit on the bill, etc... But if the customer makes a big deal, and is upset, they credit the meal. Guess what, not only do they lose out on that money, the waiter most likely doesn't get as good of a tip, and they most likely won't come back to you're restaurant.
So when do you give in to a customer's demands, and when do you stand firm to the policy? I don't mind giving in to the demands if it's asked for respectful, and there's truly no other option. But trust me, you disrespect me or my employees, I will be standing firm all day long. Just a thought for everyone out there. If you don't work in retail, you shop retail. I hope you are not the demanding and rude customer, and if you are, look in the mirror. Is this who your mother would be proud of, is this behavior something she'd be ok with? And would you be ok with someone screaming at your grandmother this way? Or your child? If you aren't then adjust your approach. You always catch more flys with honey than vinegar....
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Drama-- you can't live with it, but some girls just can't live without it....
Soo... It's been a minute since I've written anything of substance worth even pushing publish, so I'm taking a crack at it tonight. I moved to Vegas (look at post from circa 2010?) finally over a year ago, and my life has actually calmed down for the most part. I've met some great people, a few I actually consider friends, and I've met probably the most amazing man I could have ever imagined and I'm lucky enough to call him my boyfriend. Other than that I'm pretty much a loner and I love it. I have acquaintances, and sure there are times when I am lonely, but my group of friends from home visit often, and I know there is always someone I can call to hang out with when I'm super bored - and shocker - it's not always about going out and drinking!!!
Now, my life is pretty lame. I really don't do much, but work, dance every once in a great while, and occasional dinners with friends here and there. I do get to go to Colorado monthly, but even that is more just to see him and not for partying. Which is how I like it. Which is another blog all in itself, so stay tuned for that one later. But because I have my normal spots I go too, I see the same people. I line dance, and there's only so many places to do that in Vegas, (3 to be exact, well 2 until Stoney's opens back up) so you see the same people at every place. You become "friends" with them, you are on facebook with people because you recognize them when your out, etc. You hear the girls say the same thing over and over and over- "Ugh, I hate drama." "Drama is not welcome here" blah blah blah. But you always notice the girls who post about drama, are always the ones who are involved in it, or trying to start it, etc. That's a well known fact. The girls who don't talk about it, don't have it. Now I think every girl, no matter what, has some sort of "drama" in her life. Whether it be friends, work, boyfriend/husband, family, etc... It's how you handle it that makes it dramatic.
Let's look at the definition of the word drama: any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting, or striking interest or results. (Thank you dictionary.com) or even dramatic: Employing the form or matter of the drama.
Almost every event in our life has one of these elements, whether it be emotional, interesting, vivid, or conflicting. It's human nature. Do some people emphasize the emotional parts? Absolutely. Do some people make conflicts for no reason? On occasion. Is every little detail considered interesting to some people? Sure, if those people are narcissistic, or if they are extremely insecure, they over compensate for their insecurities by posting every detail of their life, just to prove they have one!
Now, I will not sit here and tell you I've never had drama. Of course I have. I am an extremely emotional female at times, and I blow things out of proportion sometimes, and I get upset over the littlest things. But I feel I do a good job at not blasting other people in public, or making huge scenes. (I've done that once or twice, and it's never ended good, so why do it??) But I constantly see the same girls posting about drama, and how they hate it, and they aren't dramatic, etc blah blah blah (insert index finger in mouth) Part of me just wants to go up to them and say honey- YOU ARE THE DRAMA. Sure they may not cause it, but they react to it and play into the people who are just as dramatic! Weren't we all taught when we were younger that if you were being made fun of, or being talked about, to just ignore it and it will go away, or they'll eventually stop? Guess what, the same applies to drama! If you ignore it, or stop talking about it, or stop blasting people on social sites, it will go away!!!! But if every other status or comment is "so and so is prank calling me" or "UGH I hate my friends, they ask me to come out here with them and I don't have a job, but I moved for them, and now they won't cater to me" I can guarantee you, because you are also that person who friends everyone and their mother on facebook, that they are going to read it and then it's going to get ugly. There's your drama. If you have an issue with someone, talk to them. Don't blast them on social media sites. It's rude, immature, and honestly, it's not the rest of the world's problem, or the rest of your friends' problems. It shows your level of maturity (or lack of it) when you can't privately and respectfully go up to that person to vent to them. You don't need to vent to everyone and their mother about it. That's what your friends are for, not social media.
Now if you are reading this, and you know you have drama in your life, look at your habits and surroundings. You put yourself in the middle of it, you can take yourself out of it. YOU have the ability to clear out the people in your life that cause it, and YOU have the ability to grow up and out of it and move on. I truly wish I could give people the ability to stand outside their situation, and look at it from an analytical point of view. You know when people talk about you, it's jealousy. When boys make fun of you, they like you (well at least in middle school). What you need to learn to do is be the better person when they are talking about you, and know it may be jealousy, but be the better person. Let it go. Don't toot your own horn saying it's because all these girls are jealous of me. That makes you look conceited, and vain. Those are two looks that never look good on anyone. If you truly are as sweet, calm, and laid back as you claim to be, no one would have any right to talk, or have anything to talk about, right? I'm just sayin....
Now, my life is pretty lame. I really don't do much, but work, dance every once in a great while, and occasional dinners with friends here and there. I do get to go to Colorado monthly, but even that is more just to see him and not for partying. Which is how I like it. Which is another blog all in itself, so stay tuned for that one later. But because I have my normal spots I go too, I see the same people. I line dance, and there's only so many places to do that in Vegas, (3 to be exact, well 2 until Stoney's opens back up) so you see the same people at every place. You become "friends" with them, you are on facebook with people because you recognize them when your out, etc. You hear the girls say the same thing over and over and over- "Ugh, I hate drama." "Drama is not welcome here" blah blah blah. But you always notice the girls who post about drama, are always the ones who are involved in it, or trying to start it, etc. That's a well known fact. The girls who don't talk about it, don't have it. Now I think every girl, no matter what, has some sort of "drama" in her life. Whether it be friends, work, boyfriend/husband, family, etc... It's how you handle it that makes it dramatic.
Let's look at the definition of the word drama: any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting, or striking interest or results. (Thank you dictionary.com) or even dramatic: Employing the form or matter of the drama.
Almost every event in our life has one of these elements, whether it be emotional, interesting, vivid, or conflicting. It's human nature. Do some people emphasize the emotional parts? Absolutely. Do some people make conflicts for no reason? On occasion. Is every little detail considered interesting to some people? Sure, if those people are narcissistic, or if they are extremely insecure, they over compensate for their insecurities by posting every detail of their life, just to prove they have one!
Now, I will not sit here and tell you I've never had drama. Of course I have. I am an extremely emotional female at times, and I blow things out of proportion sometimes, and I get upset over the littlest things. But I feel I do a good job at not blasting other people in public, or making huge scenes. (I've done that once or twice, and it's never ended good, so why do it??) But I constantly see the same girls posting about drama, and how they hate it, and they aren't dramatic, etc blah blah blah (insert index finger in mouth) Part of me just wants to go up to them and say honey- YOU ARE THE DRAMA. Sure they may not cause it, but they react to it and play into the people who are just as dramatic! Weren't we all taught when we were younger that if you were being made fun of, or being talked about, to just ignore it and it will go away, or they'll eventually stop? Guess what, the same applies to drama! If you ignore it, or stop talking about it, or stop blasting people on social sites, it will go away!!!! But if every other status or comment is "so and so is prank calling me" or "UGH I hate my friends, they ask me to come out here with them and I don't have a job, but I moved for them, and now they won't cater to me" I can guarantee you, because you are also that person who friends everyone and their mother on facebook, that they are going to read it and then it's going to get ugly. There's your drama. If you have an issue with someone, talk to them. Don't blast them on social media sites. It's rude, immature, and honestly, it's not the rest of the world's problem, or the rest of your friends' problems. It shows your level of maturity (or lack of it) when you can't privately and respectfully go up to that person to vent to them. You don't need to vent to everyone and their mother about it. That's what your friends are for, not social media.
Now if you are reading this, and you know you have drama in your life, look at your habits and surroundings. You put yourself in the middle of it, you can take yourself out of it. YOU have the ability to clear out the people in your life that cause it, and YOU have the ability to grow up and out of it and move on. I truly wish I could give people the ability to stand outside their situation, and look at it from an analytical point of view. You know when people talk about you, it's jealousy. When boys make fun of you, they like you (well at least in middle school). What you need to learn to do is be the better person when they are talking about you, and know it may be jealousy, but be the better person. Let it go. Don't toot your own horn saying it's because all these girls are jealous of me. That makes you look conceited, and vain. Those are two looks that never look good on anyone. If you truly are as sweet, calm, and laid back as you claim to be, no one would have any right to talk, or have anything to talk about, right? I'm just sayin....
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Will you be my Valentine?
Of course you should expect me to write about this holiday. I'm a romantic at heart. I believe love conquers all, and I believe that if you love someone, nothing should stop you from trying to make it work. I am not saying stalk the person you love, but can you truly be in love with someone if some sort of feelings for you aren't reciprocated? Yes; you can love someone who only likes you, and yes; feelings tend to run deeper in one person vs the other, but if you have to stalk the person you love, it's not love, it's an obsession and you need to go get help.
But this is more of a history lesson for me, and a way to learn something new about a holiday that I've always been pretty fortunate to have amazing memories from. Yes it's a cheesy hallmark holiday, but it doesn't mean a girl doesn't like a little romance on that day... a candle lit picnic on the beach is perfect :) (thank you Sean for that memory lol)
The history of Valentines day I'm sure everyone knows: a saint (St. Valentine) who was jailed for secretly marrying soldiers under a tyrants rule who believed that marriage made men weak. So as he was jailed, he fell in love with the jailkeepers daughter, and the night before he was killed, he sent her a note signing it, "love your Valentine"- hence the first valentine ever. That story is touching mind you, but its not "The Notebook".
The part of St. Valentine that I admire most was that, he risked his life because he believed in the love of others. Not that he died and wrote the woman he loved, but he knew the law, and still believed in the love between two strangers that he was willing to risk his own life to make them happy.
So besides the actual real history of Valentine's Day, here's some other facts about this "Hallmark" holiday:
-Alexander Graham Bell applied for his patent on the telephone, an "Improvement in Telegraphy", on Valentine's Day, 1876
-During the late 1800s, postage rates around the world dropped, and the "x-rated" St. Valentine's Day card became popular, the numbers of racy valentines grew, several countries banned the practice of exchanging Valentine's Days cards. During this period, Chicago's post office rejected more than 25,000 cards on the grounds that they were so indecent, they were not fit to be carried through the U.S. mail.
-It wasn't until 1537 that St. Valentine's Day was declared an official holiday. England's King Henry VIII declared February 14th a holiday
-The oldest known Valentines were sent in 1415 A.D. by the Duke of Orleans to his French wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London. It is still on display in a museum in England.
-The oldest surviving love poem is written in a clay tablet from the times of the Sumerians, inventors of writing, around 3500 B.C. It was unromantically named Istanbul #2461 by the archeologists who unearthed it.
For me, the history of this holiday has created some of the best memories I have. I've been extremely lucky to have men who loved to rarely show their emotions :) So this day got him to actually verbally express his feelings for me. Now whether it was just the holiday, or if he truly felt that way, I can't answer that, BUT I can say that at the time I felt and believed he meant every word that was said. I remember surprising my boyfriend by flying out to see him on Valentine's day (also our anniversary) and we honestly did nothing but sit at home and watch movies and cuddle, and it was amazing :) Well, he did make me chocolate covered strawberries, and an amazing dinner, but no presents were exchanged :)
So if you're reading this, and there is someone that you wish you could be with, and you can't, it shouldn't stop you from telling them how you feel. Even if nothing may come of it, man up, or woman up and tell them <3. We'll see if I take my own advice right???
Happy Valentine's Day, and even though it's a hallmark holiday, it's still ok to be a little extra romantic on this day ;)
But this is more of a history lesson for me, and a way to learn something new about a holiday that I've always been pretty fortunate to have amazing memories from. Yes it's a cheesy hallmark holiday, but it doesn't mean a girl doesn't like a little romance on that day... a candle lit picnic on the beach is perfect :) (thank you Sean for that memory lol)
The history of Valentines day I'm sure everyone knows: a saint (St. Valentine) who was jailed for secretly marrying soldiers under a tyrants rule who believed that marriage made men weak. So as he was jailed, he fell in love with the jailkeepers daughter, and the night before he was killed, he sent her a note signing it, "love your Valentine"- hence the first valentine ever. That story is touching mind you, but its not "The Notebook".
The part of St. Valentine that I admire most was that, he risked his life because he believed in the love of others. Not that he died and wrote the woman he loved, but he knew the law, and still believed in the love between two strangers that he was willing to risk his own life to make them happy.
So besides the actual real history of Valentine's Day, here's some other facts about this "Hallmark" holiday:
-Alexander Graham Bell applied for his patent on the telephone, an "Improvement in Telegraphy", on Valentine's Day, 1876
-During the late 1800s, postage rates around the world dropped, and the "x-rated" St. Valentine's Day card became popular, the numbers of racy valentines grew, several countries banned the practice of exchanging Valentine's Days cards. During this period, Chicago's post office rejected more than 25,000 cards on the grounds that they were so indecent, they were not fit to be carried through the U.S. mail.
-It wasn't until 1537 that St. Valentine's Day was declared an official holiday. England's King Henry VIII declared February 14th a holiday
-The oldest known Valentines were sent in 1415 A.D. by the Duke of Orleans to his French wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London. It is still on display in a museum in England.
-The oldest surviving love poem is written in a clay tablet from the times of the Sumerians, inventors of writing, around 3500 B.C. It was unromantically named Istanbul #2461 by the archeologists who unearthed it.
For me, the history of this holiday has created some of the best memories I have. I've been extremely lucky to have men who loved to rarely show their emotions :) So this day got him to actually verbally express his feelings for me. Now whether it was just the holiday, or if he truly felt that way, I can't answer that, BUT I can say that at the time I felt and believed he meant every word that was said. I remember surprising my boyfriend by flying out to see him on Valentine's day (also our anniversary) and we honestly did nothing but sit at home and watch movies and cuddle, and it was amazing :) Well, he did make me chocolate covered strawberries, and an amazing dinner, but no presents were exchanged :)
So if you're reading this, and there is someone that you wish you could be with, and you can't, it shouldn't stop you from telling them how you feel. Even if nothing may come of it, man up, or woman up and tell them <3. We'll see if I take my own advice right???
Happy Valentine's Day, and even though it's a hallmark holiday, it's still ok to be a little extra romantic on this day ;)
Friday, January 21, 2011
To care or not to care?
To care or not to care? That is the question. Is it better to care much or not to care enough? And if the answer is to just care just enough, how do you know what enough is? How do you know that if you get upset because someone cancelled on you that it means you're caring too much. Or that if it doesn't upset you you don't care enough. These are the stupid things that run through my mind, and then make me feel bad for not caring enough. I don't want to care to the point to where I get hurt. I don't want it to bother me that I know something's wrong but I can't mention anything because I'm not supposed to know about it. There's multiple reasons that caring too much sucks. The easiest one to point out is that you get hurt. Easier and more often than those who don't care enough. But then the ones who don't care enough are looked at being self centered and selfish people.
There's two completely situations that make me question this. One is more complicated than I can even try to explain. and the other situation is a typical dating situation that girls should be used to, but still have no idea how to go about it or how to react to it. So I'll explain the first before I even try to explain the second.
Situation #1: This is easy to explain. Girl meets guy a few weeks ago. Went out on a few dates and seemingly everything went well. At least thats what I've heard. And its not like it got serious too fast. Here's where the tricky part comes into play. She overreads a text that she shouldn't have read and it was basically about asking if he had talked to another girl, and then the second text had mentioned well I just told her you went to dinner with your parents, when clearly he wasn't at dinner. I've tried to tell her that its ok, you aren't serious with the guy, you have no right to be upset, but then again, why hide it and lie about it if you aren't doing something wrong? Why would he need to lie about whats he's doing if he's not serious with her. And if he is serious with her why is he taking other girls out. Maybe he's not serious with her, but she is with him and he doesn't want to hurt the other girl? See this is where all this caring stuff comes into play. Are you supposed to care if you know he's dating someone else or are you supposed to prove that you should be the one he chooses. She likes the guy, and she wants to see what happens with him, but then again, from her previous experiences, she could end up hurt again. Should she cut the ties now and say forget it, or wait it out. Here's some more info before the answer:
She ran into him on accident one night when she was out with her friends, and he was out with his. True, it was his normal hang out, but there was no real reason for concern to running into him. Well, she ran into him. And it was awkward. Not just like Hey, how are u? blah blah blah, but she felt like she was intruding. She was literally shaking when she was talking to him. No idea why, but she was. Either way, here's another thing in the mix... the other girl he was talking to apparently works there. So, more than anything, it sucks for him. Both the girls he's talking to are there. He can't act like he would normally because if he did, they'd both figure it out. Well little to his knowledge one of them knows. Ugh. She wishes she didn't know. She wishes she was kept in the dark, and that none of this was never figured out. She could have been blissfully unaware of everything, and not be worried and stressed about what she does know, and then thinking she's being played. You would think that after everything she's been through this shouldn't be shocked but she is. Well thats the easy situation.
Now for the more difficult:
So I'm slowling coming to the conclusion that I have strong feelings for someone and I know it's not a good situation. Not because he's a bad guy, or anything like that, but because it's just the worlds worst situation. I am coming to terms with these feelings, and I am sure he knows, because he has to be an idiot not to know, but he's not going to do anything about it, that's not his style. I've considered him one of the people that I can go to for anything and get an honest answer and never really have to worry about him lying to me. Does that mean I trust him to not hurt me? Absolutely not. It's so complicated. Well not really complicated, just completely unidealistic. Do I tell him and risk the change in friendship, or do I just keep it quiet and hope this all just goes away. It would be one thing if nothing ever happened, but there's obvious attraction to each other. We both are attracted to each other and we both know that even with boundaries, its still hard to follow the rules. I want him to know everything, and I want to be able to tell him that him being across the country sucks and I want to be there. I want to tell him that no matter what he'd be the one I'd prefer to be with. He'd be the one I'd rather do things for and go places with. (besides my girls) He's the one I want to be lonely for. I've done this long distance before and it sucks. I hate it. I'd be willing to try it all over again because I truly think that he's worth it. He doesn't. And in all reality he probably isn't. He's just a guy. I know his flaws, and he's got a few of them, but I can over look those. I can overlook his pessimistic view on everything, and his sarcasm for every remark made, and his jack ass comments, and his mood swings, because he's the one I know would be there if I called him at 3 in the morning (if his phone was on) and come and pick me up if I needed a ride. He's also the one who always says to drive safe, and text me when you get home, and making sure I'm ok if I seem upset. He's the one telling me sleep well every night and good morning every morning. Those gestures mean the world to me. Well that's my dilemma, wish I could just see the answer of what I'm supposed to do. Do I care too much about him? Is it ok if I feel bummed if I don't hear from him the next day? Or do I just say screw it, it's never going to work, and give up and not care about what he does. How do I stop caring too much so I don't get bummed out? This is what I struggle with most. Caring too much. Its a great quality for a partner to have, but it sucks when you can't control who you care too much for.
There's two completely situations that make me question this. One is more complicated than I can even try to explain. and the other situation is a typical dating situation that girls should be used to, but still have no idea how to go about it or how to react to it. So I'll explain the first before I even try to explain the second.
Situation #1: This is easy to explain. Girl meets guy a few weeks ago. Went out on a few dates and seemingly everything went well. At least thats what I've heard. And its not like it got serious too fast. Here's where the tricky part comes into play. She overreads a text that she shouldn't have read and it was basically about asking if he had talked to another girl, and then the second text had mentioned well I just told her you went to dinner with your parents, when clearly he wasn't at dinner. I've tried to tell her that its ok, you aren't serious with the guy, you have no right to be upset, but then again, why hide it and lie about it if you aren't doing something wrong? Why would he need to lie about whats he's doing if he's not serious with her. And if he is serious with her why is he taking other girls out. Maybe he's not serious with her, but she is with him and he doesn't want to hurt the other girl? See this is where all this caring stuff comes into play. Are you supposed to care if you know he's dating someone else or are you supposed to prove that you should be the one he chooses. She likes the guy, and she wants to see what happens with him, but then again, from her previous experiences, she could end up hurt again. Should she cut the ties now and say forget it, or wait it out. Here's some more info before the answer:
She ran into him on accident one night when she was out with her friends, and he was out with his. True, it was his normal hang out, but there was no real reason for concern to running into him. Well, she ran into him. And it was awkward. Not just like Hey, how are u? blah blah blah, but she felt like she was intruding. She was literally shaking when she was talking to him. No idea why, but she was. Either way, here's another thing in the mix... the other girl he was talking to apparently works there. So, more than anything, it sucks for him. Both the girls he's talking to are there. He can't act like he would normally because if he did, they'd both figure it out. Well little to his knowledge one of them knows. Ugh. She wishes she didn't know. She wishes she was kept in the dark, and that none of this was never figured out. She could have been blissfully unaware of everything, and not be worried and stressed about what she does know, and then thinking she's being played. You would think that after everything she's been through this shouldn't be shocked but she is. Well thats the easy situation.
Now for the more difficult:
So I'm slowling coming to the conclusion that I have strong feelings for someone and I know it's not a good situation. Not because he's a bad guy, or anything like that, but because it's just the worlds worst situation. I am coming to terms with these feelings, and I am sure he knows, because he has to be an idiot not to know, but he's not going to do anything about it, that's not his style. I've considered him one of the people that I can go to for anything and get an honest answer and never really have to worry about him lying to me. Does that mean I trust him to not hurt me? Absolutely not. It's so complicated. Well not really complicated, just completely unidealistic. Do I tell him and risk the change in friendship, or do I just keep it quiet and hope this all just goes away. It would be one thing if nothing ever happened, but there's obvious attraction to each other. We both are attracted to each other and we both know that even with boundaries, its still hard to follow the rules. I want him to know everything, and I want to be able to tell him that him being across the country sucks and I want to be there. I want to tell him that no matter what he'd be the one I'd prefer to be with. He'd be the one I'd rather do things for and go places with. (besides my girls) He's the one I want to be lonely for. I've done this long distance before and it sucks. I hate it. I'd be willing to try it all over again because I truly think that he's worth it. He doesn't. And in all reality he probably isn't. He's just a guy. I know his flaws, and he's got a few of them, but I can over look those. I can overlook his pessimistic view on everything, and his sarcasm for every remark made, and his jack ass comments, and his mood swings, because he's the one I know would be there if I called him at 3 in the morning (if his phone was on) and come and pick me up if I needed a ride. He's also the one who always says to drive safe, and text me when you get home, and making sure I'm ok if I seem upset. He's the one telling me sleep well every night and good morning every morning. Those gestures mean the world to me. Well that's my dilemma, wish I could just see the answer of what I'm supposed to do. Do I care too much about him? Is it ok if I feel bummed if I don't hear from him the next day? Or do I just say screw it, it's never going to work, and give up and not care about what he does. How do I stop caring too much so I don't get bummed out? This is what I struggle with most. Caring too much. Its a great quality for a partner to have, but it sucks when you can't control who you care too much for.
Friday, January 7, 2011
New Year, New Me???
So it's the beginning of the year, and its the time when everyone makes resolutions. I don't. I have never been a fan of resolutions, because it's almost like making a promise to yourself you know you're going to break. If you need a new year to make a resolution, it shows you have no motivation to make your own goals. Yes a new year gives it a perfect time to start over, but really, it's just an excuse for people to make goals because everyone else is making them. I have goals that I would like to accomplish, and I have deadlines, but I hate calling them resolutions. That's just me :)
So besides the new year, there's nothing really new going on. I hate saying goodbye to people, especially people I get close to. Now mind you, it's not like its goodbye forever, but its still a goodbye. Especially when you saw the person like 3 times a week, talked daily, and was always your go to person for anything :( It's like losing a part of you. At first it didn't feel like anything was different, and then I went to call them and they were across the country unable to go to dinner. It's just about getting used to it. Any who... that's not even scratching the surface on how much it sucks, but it'll get better :/
SO new year, new me? Probably not a much different me than last year. I'm definitely a more skeptical person when it comes to men. I don't trust them as much as I should, and I don't trust them nearly enough to have a relationship with them. Even the close guy friends that I could see myself with I can't even trust them enough to not hurt me. I know I'm at the place where I can commit and settle down with someone, but I just don't know if I could trust them to not hurt me. So we'll see how this new year treats me. I'm not expecting a grand year, and I don't necessarily hate last year, I moved on a lot from what I needed to last year, and I grew a lot as a person. This year will be a good one as well, but no new me. I like the old me just as much as I would like any new me :)
So besides the new year, there's nothing really new going on. I hate saying goodbye to people, especially people I get close to. Now mind you, it's not like its goodbye forever, but its still a goodbye. Especially when you saw the person like 3 times a week, talked daily, and was always your go to person for anything :( It's like losing a part of you. At first it didn't feel like anything was different, and then I went to call them and they were across the country unable to go to dinner. It's just about getting used to it. Any who... that's not even scratching the surface on how much it sucks, but it'll get better :/
SO new year, new me? Probably not a much different me than last year. I'm definitely a more skeptical person when it comes to men. I don't trust them as much as I should, and I don't trust them nearly enough to have a relationship with them. Even the close guy friends that I could see myself with I can't even trust them enough to not hurt me. I know I'm at the place where I can commit and settle down with someone, but I just don't know if I could trust them to not hurt me. So we'll see how this new year treats me. I'm not expecting a grand year, and I don't necessarily hate last year, I moved on a lot from what I needed to last year, and I grew a lot as a person. This year will be a good one as well, but no new me. I like the old me just as much as I would like any new me :)
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